Lisa Dunning, California Marriage & Family Therapist
Parent / Child Relationship Expert

Three Parenting Styles

"Because parents socialize their children through the establishment of rules and communication patterns in the family, the degree and quality of parental control and involvement have a major impact on adolescent development." (Sartor and Youniss)  Every parent has a different interpretation or perception of parenting. Disagreement occurs when one partner does not agree with the consequence the other spouse implemented. One partner may have been raised in an environment where spanking was administered as the primary form of punishment. The common argument is, "Well I was spanked as a child and I grew up okay." The other parent may not believe in the use of spanking, or may believe spanking should only be used as a last resort in favor of less aggressive forms of discipline. Obviously these are two extremely different interpretations of parenting with each parent expressing a drastically different viewpoint and approach to administering consequences. Your disagreements probably fall somewhere in between these two extremes. To resolve this argument or a similar argument between parents, a better understanding of the different styles of parenting is necessary so both parents can have a common framework from which to begin a dialogue. Only after a complete understanding of these styles can a meaningful dialogue begin and ultimately a resolution.